I'm listening to mass this Sunday morning. I'm also crying because we cleaned out Frank's medicine drawer today. Everything was thrown out. I am sad by it, but its been almost a year, and I don't want to remember his taking pills 3 or 4 times a day. I want to remember the fun times.
I want to remember the snuggly times.
I want to stop crying every time I walk his walk at the fairgrounds.
Its still sad and painful. I need to make it happy memories that make me smile, but it isn't happening.
When will it start to happen?
I'm hiding my pain and that's not good. Most people would think, its just a dog.
He was my best friend. He helped me get through cancer. I tried to make his heart failure comfortable. I couldn't fix it, though. I couldn't cure him.
Now I'm crying again. I miss him so much my heart hurts. I pray there is a God and he lets me be with my little guy again one day. I will be so disappointed if this is it.
